


What they think of Jack

by FragileObject



Category: Torchwood
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-17
Updated: 2013-03-17
Packaged: 2017-12-05 15:25:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/724820
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FragileObject/pseuds/FragileObject
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Being Jack Harkness is not easy and his teammates know it. But only one person is able to understand it in all its dimensions.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What they think of Jack

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [Lo que ellos piensan de Jack](https://archiveofourown.org/works/724783) by [FragileObject](https://archiveofourown.org/users/FragileObject/pseuds/FragileObject). 



> I sincerely apologize for my humble english. Really.

It was evening and Ianto had just cleaned the kitchen of the Hub when he heard the gear door open and then close behind their mates. Jack, Gwen and Owen were returning from a mission. Tosh had been gone a while ago, when the rest of the team had assured him through the intercom that they were coming back and that her presence was not required to investigate any new alien device. Ianto, of course, had been waiting. Ianto always waited.

The young Welshman methodically kept the last cleaning products while listening to the unmistakable voice of Jack giving unintelligible orders, and left the kitchen. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Owen disappearing in the medical area with a large bag. The strong steps of the Captain’s boots echoed through the metal stairs and, looking up, Ianto just caught a glimpse of the long coat waving a moment before getting into his office. He looked straight ahead. At least Gwen was by with her table, but seemed vaguely distracted.

—Why such a hurry? —Ianto greeted by approaching her.

—Owen’s taking the remains of the alien in a bag and wants to freeze it before they deteriorate further. It’s breaking down fast.

—I see —Ianto said—. What about Jack?

—He said we can go home —Gwen said collecting some papers and hanging her bag—. He has gone up to take a shower.

When she turned and smiled, Ianto, who was a master at reading people’s expressions, began to worry. Gwen’s broad smile shook slightly. Her large expressive eyes had not its normal shine.

—You said Tosh it had been an uneventful mission... —he said in a voice even lower than usual and sternly. 

Gwen tilted her head and her bangs covered her eyes. He looked very dejected.

—And it was... The alien is dead, we have recovered what remains of its body, we have covered the events to look like a drunken fight...

—So? —Ianto asked, waiting for something he knew he was not going to like. Something that, deep down, he knew he already knew, but was not able to conceive at that time.

—Jack died... —Gwen’s sincere eyes stared at him. Ianto took a deep breath. She tried a slight smile—. But that usually happens, so...

She tidied up a pile of papers on his desk and appeared ready to leave. His companion stopped her taking her arm.

—Gwen... 

No words were needed. She knew that Ianto was more than the archivist-butler-keeper of Torchwood. Ianto watched, cared about everyone. And he was more than Jack’s personal assistant. Everyone knew that the young man was more, much more than an office affair to Jack.

—Well, it’s not that it hasn’t happened before, it's just... —she sighed and leaned against her desk—. It's just that it was very unpleasant. 

Ianto did not move. He tried to sharpen his ear, to hear some sound from Jack’s office, but only got silence. So he forced himself to focus on what Gwen was saying.

—Why was it unpleasant?

Gwen giggled.

—Well, we pursued that thing to the warehouse in the docks. Jack led the way, he had almost reached it. They got into a place that looked like a garage, with one of those doors that rise... When Owen and I went around the corner, the last thing I saw was how the alien took out a sort of sharp nail from the end of one of its limbs and cut Jack’s chest —she said gesturing up with her hand over her own body, from the right side of her waist to her left shoulder —. I saw blood, I saw a lot of blood ... Then the door fell and trapped them inside. Owen and I tried to open it but it was blocked. We could still hear noises of struggle inside. In the end, we heard shots. When Owen managed to open the door with that thing we found two weeks ago that AC... restorer or whatever Tosh calls it, Jack was dead. He had bled to death. He was lying on the floor with the gun in his hand. The alien was also dead and began to deflate with the loss of fluids. Jack had managed to kill him before dying. Owen and I picked up everything and waited until Jack awake. It wasn’t long, about half an hour... Owen said the death... Jack’s death had been quick, and therefore he had recovered relatively quickly. 

Ianto forced himself to inspire. His lungs were stiff.

—Is that all?

—Yes — Gwen said running a hand across her forehead. Then she smiled —. I’m being a fool. When Jack woke up he behaved as usual. Joking, giving orders... I mean... He must have died a hundred times. How can it affect him now? It's Jack!

—Yes, that’s our Jack —Ianto nodded with a slight smile.

—And I was worried because he had died alone, locked up with a nasty alien. As if that could affect him.

Gwen looked at Ianto with a weary gesture. She felt a little ashamed of herself.

—Go home and rest. Forget Torchwood until tomorrow.

The girl smiled, now more widely and headed for the door.

—See you tomorrow. Don’t be too hard with Jack!

Ianto looked at the gear door while shutting, then looked up toward the Captain’s office. With a sigh, Ianto turned and headed for the kitchen.

It's Jack. Jack dies but he resurrects. It has happened to him hundreds of times, he’s more than used to it. Death is but a small inconvenience for him. Jack smiles with a power of two million watts, Jack makes lewd comments without any respect, Jack flirts with anything that has a central nervous system... Jack is above death, pain, love, sex...

That's what they thought of Jack. Ianto engaged the coffee machine and heard Owen also left the base. 

But they had no idea. But, after all, it wasn’t their fault. Jack preferred, by experience, stay away. It was easier that way. Often, even Jack came to believe it. This blithe attitude was his nature, but also protected him from the world. And Jack needed such protection. Ianto knew it.

The young man poured two cups of coffee, put them on a tray, and walked across the Hub.

What others did not know was that Jack was afraid to die just like everyone else. Only, if any, it was a different fear. Jack was afraid of pain, death, terrible loneliness and aberrant darkness that surrounded him any time he lose his life. Each time, he feared and longed to be the last one. 

Slowly, he began to climb the stairs.

Jack had explained it to Ianto one night, both alone, naked and cuddled in his small hole below his office, after an amazing, raging and bordering on the wilderness sex session, as wild as the death that Jack had suffered the same day at the hands of habitual criminals who had managed to get certain alien weapons. Humans were able of monstrosities that would make paling other races and everyone in Torchwood knew. That day, Jack had experienced firsthand. The agony had been long and painful. The resurrection, as in some cases, was even worse. Then, in the privacy of his burrow, exhausted and in tears, the Captain had told his lover what he felt every time he died and every time he resuscitated. Ianto wept in silence, tightening harder Jack’s perfect and trembling body. He called him cariad for the first time and then they both laughed. That night, Ianto Jones knew many things about life, death, the fabric of time and the feelings of the real Jack Harkness.

Ianto arrived at the door of his boss office. He went in without knocking.

What others did not understand was that Captain Harkness was more human than anyone else. They did not understand that he saw life as the most precious mystery of the universe, that if he flirted with every living creature was because he saw and loved the beauty of everything around him. They did not know that, sometimes, Jack laughed when he made love with Ianto. Or that, sometimes, he cried. 

Jack was sat on his chair, reading something on his computer. He was wearing clean clothes and his hair was still wet from the shower. He listened to Ianto, looked up and smiled. It wasn’t his more powerful smile. It might fool others but not Ianto.

—Oh, Ianto, I was wondering if it would be possible... 

Ianto placed his boss favourite cup, full of magical coffee, in front of him. Jack’s smile improved considerably.

—What would I do without you? — Jack asked as Ianto left the other cup on the table, pulled a chair close to his beloved man and looked at him.

—Gwen has told me —Ianto said in his deep and beautiful voice.

The Captain’s smile faded and his gaze turned back to the screen of his computer. He sipped his coffee in silence. Ianto often accused him of being a reckless and he feared Ianto was angry with him for chasing an alien somewhat viscous and with pseudopods provided with retractable razor nails to the most abandoned old Cardiff docks.

—It's nothing. I'm fine.

Ianto raised his hand, unbuttoned a few buttons of Jack’s shirt and touched the fabric of his shirt. Sure there still were traces of the wound in his chest. Perhaps it even hurt. They both looked at each other. Jack’s eyes seemed frightened, guilty; Ianto’s eyes were strangely blank. The young man stood silently by distinguishing marks of blows on the beautiful face of Jack.

—It's okay, Ianto, I'm fine — the Captain repeated—. I'll be fine by tomorrow.

Ianto’s hand slid down Jack’s chest, to stay resting on his knee.

—As you say, Jack.

The Captain’s eyes were fixed on the computer screen but when Ianto withdrew his hand, turned quickly to look at the young man. Jack made a great effort and got a beaming and carefree smile.

—You know, I'd rather not be alone tonight. Do you stay with me?

—No.

Jack’s smile froze on her pretty lips and for a nanosecond became a grimace of anguish. But Captain Jack Harkness, true to his reputation, did not accept a “no” for an answer. He put again his smiling mask, which he did more often than his people thought.

—Okay, we can go out to dinner... Would you like Italian food? If not, I also know a great Japanese.

—No —Ianto repeated gravely.

This time, Jack lost all reason to smile. He was tired, sore and scared. That night, after what had happened, he needed more than ever to feel alive and safe, to forget he was a strange and impossible thing. But perhaps he had gone too far and Ianto was tired of playing along. He couldn’t blame him, of course, who was he to do that? Ianto was young, brilliant, normal... Ianto didn’t even like men. Their relationship was an indefinable mystery. But he’d be so sorry of hurting Ianto, he would be so hurt is he had broken their friendship... if it could be called friendship.

—I... —said Jack, looking down, forcing back tears that rose in his throat and covering it with a hint of a smile—. I thought we could have a good time...

—I said no —Ianto’s deep voice repeating that word made him more afraid that if a dalek entered the Hub through the gear door at that same moment. Jack looked at him, tears trembling in his pale blue eyes—, Tonight you're coming home, cariad, you'll eat what I cook and we will watch TV on the couch until we fall asleep.

A tear escaped and rolled down Jack’s cheek. He wiped it, but he continued to stare Ianto’s deep blue and serene eyes.

—All right —he said quietly.

Ianto stood up and kissed his forehead. It was a gesture that Jack used to repeat with him. And with everyone he loved. But especially with Ianto, because wasit Ianto who gave him a meaning to his existence at that time. And in a way that none of their lovers or their partners had ever achieved. The kiss burned on his forehead but he was truly comforted for the first time in hours.

—We've had enough aliens, fights, deaths and resurrections for today. Tonight we are a normal and current couple going to dinner, watch TV and snuggle under a blanket.

Jack smiled weakly, but this time from the depths of his being. “Couple”. Of course, that was what they were. He nodded. He was so moved, he felt so relieved that Ianto was not angry with him that he didn’t have the need to replicate with one of his devastating sentences.

—Let me finish this and we’ll go, okay?

—Okay, but hurry up —Ianto said walking towards the door. When he arrived, he turned around—. By the way, Jack...

—Yes? —the captain asked with his beautiful smile, his eyes still bright with emotion and tears.

—You will wash the dishes.

Ianto left the office and Jack shook his head and laughed wiping another tear.


End file.
